I always stayed in some sort of darkness.. I don't know... there's just something in it that attracts me... maybe my lunacies again...
Everything came to a freezing pathetic halt. My life blurred in front of me. I pass by that day with a very heavy heart. Work barraged me like some storm and I was not in my utmost condition. I stared at the monitor of my PC doing all the accounting stuff while there is some drilling pain that is killing me inside. Yep, it was not supposed to hurt this way.. But it does. And I don't like a bit of it.
I knew that I am plummeting. I had this weird pseudo-sickness. It's like some psychological arse getting its way into me. I can't speak. My throat hurts like hell. And I am like emitting heat energies from my eyes. Hah!
Haven't had this syndrome for years.
Haven't had this syndrome for years.
There is absolutely no connection with the things that I am saying. Just some friggin scribbles to pour out all my anxieties. I woke up early this morning and I know I am in deep sh*t... Know why? Coz I cleaned the whole flat again. From every little bloody dust. --cleaning is my only defense mechanism to show that this is something that I can smoothen out among the so many aspects in my life (at least my apartment is clean, that would be one "minus" out of this chaotic darkness that I am in).
I want to sleep. Sleep til all this goes away. Til this rip-off heals. And leave some tear (healed scar I hope) to be forever remembered...
