"So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday." - Nicholas Sparks
Whoever said that marriage is THE happily ever-after is a nutcase. The wedding, perhaps, yes. All the booze, the pretty gown and lovely flowers, floating down the aisle and for that magical moment, the first time you see your fiance actually seem to have tears in his eyes. Cry, grooms, cryyy! Hahaha!
The celebration seems like a happy ever-after but noone can prepare you for another chapter of, ultimately, the scariest rollercoaster of your life.
Don't get me wrong. I love being married. I am not discouraging anyone to take their vows. I just want to say that unlike in movies or in fairytales, it does not have a resolute happy ever-after. It will take patience, faith, hope, forgiveness, lots of laughter, conversation, and of course, love, to make it work.
I have survived almost two years of this crazy chapter of my life. Despite its valleys, I would not change any aspect of my relationship, even if I had the chance.
This is because I have always been a big believer of "Everything happens for a reason." I knew that there was some Higher Being working on my love story.
From then on, happiness abound. It is true, the sweet is never as sweet without the sour. And I appreciate the sweet because I know sour.
My take-away from it all? Just these five simple realizations --
1. Marriage is a tripartite relationship among the husband, the wife, and God. Let God in.
2. Never neglect. Reply to texts and calls. Even fake a laugh to a joke. Feed each one's ego.
3. Just breathe. You are two different people. Different upbringing. Different motivations. There will be things than can be irksome sometimes because of these emotional baggages. If faced with a challenging situation, take 3 deep breaths. Inhale. Exhale. A lot of problems can be solved by breathing alone.
4. Choose to sleep in peaceful cuddle every night. No fighting. And even if you are fighting, just hug. It becomes a deaccelarator to potential big fights.
5. Lastly, love. Love unconditionally. Always remember your vows. Marriage is not a paper you just sign. It is a promise you made to the One who continues to give you another day to live. You would not want to disappoint your parents because they have given you so much. How much more This person who has given you everything? Marriage is love. God is love. God is marriage.
So to all lovebirds, to one of my high school bestfriends and two of my college bestfriends who are tying the knot soon, best wishes and let us hop in to this wild ride!
And of course, to my better half...
For all the crazy, senseless conversations
And all our speechless, silent situations
For all the tears we cried, of joy and sadness
For almost eight years spent in this madness
For the patience in dealing with my shortcomings
For your snoring, drunk, tiresome evenings
For finishing each other's broken thoughts
And for being my forget-me-not
For always reading what's inside my mind
And sealing this deal, got it all signed
For being you, for accepting me
How different yet the same, we could be
Thank you despite all that I lack
I love you always, to the moon and back.
xx,
Corporate Junkie
